Shotgun Post

  • 11:01 Packed Camera, camera charger, phone charger, five books, earphones, presents. What am I forget– Oh that’s right, clothes! #
  • 11:02 For those unaware; the parents are driving through Brisbane, picking me up and then we drive on to Canberra or Hell whatever comes first #
  • 11:07 Reminded Dad that this thinking was what got us driving through an abandoned ordinance training ground on the way to Cape York Peninsula. #
  • 11:53 Aaaand the parents are 3 hours late. All is going according to plan =) #
  • 12:01 Going to watch a Bond film in the meantime. The Spy Who Loved Me with Jaws, or View to a Kill with Grace Jones… #
  • 12:52 Our Russian top spy is called Triple X =) #
  • 12:53 Oh snap, she brought up Bond’s wedding! #
  • 12:54 “My name is Bond, James Bond.” “What of it?” #
  • 12:55 There is a lady who has almost as much metal in her bouth as Jaws does! #
  • 12:58 “Kalba was called to the phone, what happened? ” “He was ‘cut ‘off…” #
  • 13:01 Seriously, at least a 1/3rd of what makes Jaws so scary is his ability just to disappear. No one that big should be able to do that. #
  • 13:05 The remaining 2/3rds is his ability fo fucking destroy a lorry with his bare hands and teeth. #
  • 13:07 Introduction of the first gadget. A cigerette case that folds out into a microfilm reader. #
  • 13:09 Triple X just played Bond like a $2 banjo using the sleeping powder in the cigerette trick. #
  • 13:12 There’s something so blessedly colonial about MI6 having a hideout in an Egyptian tomb. #
  • 13:14 Q turns up to tell it like it is while showing off that he could everyone with a tea tray. #
  • 13:16 Fucking fuckity fuck I forgot Jaws was hiding in the closet!!! #
  • 13:19 Kicked out a train moving at lickety-split miles per hour and all he needs to do is straighten his tie. #
  • 13:21 Q “Now pay attention 007, I want you to take special care of this equipment; there are one or two feat-” #
  • 13:22 Bond “Have I ever let you down?” Q “Frequently!” #
  • 13:23 Naomi, assistant to Mr Strongburg, should have asked what happened to her predecessor. #
  • 13:28 The problem with Bond sleeping with the girl midway through the film is that you get to see Bond avoid a relationship. #
  • 13:30 All those feathers and he still can’t fly… That might need some context… #
  • 13:32 And now its the supercar’s time to shine. And Naomi can fly an atttack chopper!! #
  • 13:34 KGB Triple X marvels at the capitalist society that provides its agents #
  • 13:35 with Lotus Elise’s that turn into submarines. Meanwhile she’s lucky if Communist Russia would give her firewood to use as a club. #
  • 13:36 Ha! The first automotive hit and run underwater! #
  • 13:39 Receptionist looks like she’s wearing someone else’s face and cleavage. #
  • 13:43 “Aboard this vessel, I am Major Amasova of the Russian Army.” “Yeah sure” #
  • 13:44 “What’s the matter sailor, you’ve never seen a major take a shower before?” #
  • 13:48 Welcome to the Strongburg Organisation. Here’s your orange jumpsuit #
  • 13:52 The upshot to “Accepting the judgement of posterity” is you don’t hae to be around to hear it… #
  • 13:55 Twofer with a harpoon gun! #
  • 13:56 One gun per sailor! Simmonds, you only have two hands. How are you planning on firing the other three pistols? #
  • 13:59 I question the wisdom of bearing grenades aboard the ship with sensitive electronics #
  • 14:01 Ah the conventional British military strategy. Lead as many men into the sights of machine guns and catch as many bullets as you can. #
  • 14:05 Only now it occurs to me the ludicrous engineering idea of making a nuclear bomb so easy to detonate… #
  • 14:07 Ha ha! stock footage explosions #
  • 14:10 3 crews, one submarine. Lets just pray some Yankee doesn’t go crazy and kill us… #
  • 14:12 Amarov’s onboard, I have to get her off. The only non-intentional double entendre #
  • 14:16 Fuck! You shot me in the eeth! Fuck! I mean, Come On! #
  • 14:18 And jaws is dropped into the drink with the shark. C’mon Sharky, you want some of this!?! #
  • 14:19 It was a mouthful, his bite was worse than his bark, potential one-liners missed because Jaws can’t talk. #
  • 14:23 M “Do you think there’s a chance of the bends?” Q “Well there’s one way to find out!” Yeah you’ll bring the car back this time, won’t you! #
  • 15:45 On the road again… I have a nest of luggage so cramped I feel like a Dickens character #
  • 15:48 Dad: So how’ve you be- Mum: Let’s not do talking till we’re out of the city. When you talk, you miss corners =) #
  • 16:51 I keep thinking that every state should have a different coloured filter. I blame It’s A Knockout #
  • 18:21 NSW’s filter should be green cause it’s like Ireland here. Benefit of flooding season I suppose… #
  • 19:17 Ah 7:30, the Trucking Hour #
  • 21:37 Mmm delicious works burger. And bless the multi-colour-haired maiden’s heart, she cooked it with a runny egg #
  • 21:37 507km to Sydney #
  • 23:00 Stopped for the night. Live to drive another day #

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